Losing Your Shirt

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I was standing on the Court Street subway platform with my sister on Friday when I caught this guy looking me over.

We’d just had a lovely afternoon at Brooklyn Bridge Park and were heading to the R train to get back to Bay Ridge for dinner at a local Thai restaurant.

But now I was getting the skunk eye from a total stranger. New York’s subway system has an… intriguing cast of characters riding the rails and stalking the platforms.

In fact, these people are so interesting that I strongly prefer taking the express bus or the ferry—which is how we got to downtown Brooklyn in the first place.

The guy was standing with a young woman and, as we got closer, his gaze intensified. Finally, he spoke up.

“I like that shirt,” he said.

Shirt? What’s he talking about? It’s just a shirt, guy. What’s the big deal?

And then I remembered: oh, right, I was wearing my “Funcle” T‑shirt, which my sister had gotten me a few years ago.

The word is a portmanteau of “fun” and “uncle,” which I’m sure you already knew, but I really wanted to use thr word "portmanteau" in this post. Sounds like a type of wine...

“When your uncle is too fun to just be a normal ‘uncle,’” according to Urban Dictionary—which also listed some very twisted definitions I will not disclose.

We have two lovely nieces—Kristin and Victoria—whom we love dearly and who both thoroughly enjoyed torturing yours truly back when they were young. And they still get a few hits in today.

Years ago, when Kristin was a little thing, her best friend, Lisa, told her, "your uncle is a cool guy." That doesn't happen too often.

The black shirt has bold white lettering that defines Funcle as “like a dad, only cooler. See also: handsome, exceptional.”

We chatted a little, wished each other well, and then my sister and I walked up the platform feeling pretty good. A pleasant encounter on the subway? Hard to believe.

And then, a few minutes later, a woman walked down a nearby flight of stairs, took one look at me, and smiled.

“I love that shirt,” she said.

Again? All this goodwill and cheer in under ten minutes—over a T‑shirt? What a brilliant investment.

We got back to the neighborhood, had a delicious Thai dinner, and went on home.

We didn’t know it at the time, but this was going to be the highlight of the weekend, as we had to deal with some serious family issues that took up most of Saturday and Sunday.

And so now I’m home, gearing up for a new week. It sucks that the weekend flew by so quickly, but nevertheless, I remain the Funcle.

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