Remote Possibility

And, finally, I called for help.

Friday is usually my favorite night of the week. Work is done and I’m free to do go out on the town or go home and sit on my ass.

The choice is completely up to me and I love it.

Most Fridays I'll go for the latter, especially during the winter, and this is what I did the other night.

I had a DVD from Netflix, several programs waiting for me on the DVR, and a chicken burrito the size of a tree stump.

I was all set for some serious relaxation, but my TV’s remote control had different ideas.

This thing has been giving me trouble for the last few weeks, especially when I try to record a program or play something I’ve recorded. I would repeatedly press the OK/SEL button but nothing would happen.

Everything else—volume control, channel selection—worked just fine. But the one button I needed the most was non compos mentis.

I usually got the thing to work after a great deal of cursing and fuming, but on Friday OK/SEL went straight to hell.

I came close to breaking my thumb on this miserable knob. I switched hands, used my index finger, and finally—going full nutzoid—I grabbed a pen and pushed down on the button like Captain Ahab on a blubber hunt. And I still got nothing.

I was getting hot under the collar while my burrito was getting cold on the plate. That remote control was doing a good job of controlling me.

SEL No!

Now I hate having programs taking up space on the DVR and I feel strangely satisfied when I watch a show or movie and then zap it right out of my life. Being unable to delete this stuff was making me crazy.

Enough, I told myself, call the damn cable company before you have a stroke.

Actually, it took two phone calls, but the cable people finally determined that my remote was officially on the fritz and they promised to ship me a new one.

As far Friday, I had a DVD from Netflix for entertainment and some streaming content as well.

Now this was a minor incident that has some major implications.

First—and most seriously—I once again complained about the problem, I got angry about the problem, but did nothing to solve the damn problem until it got spun out of control and I had no choice.

If I had settled this business last week, I’ve could enjoy my program, my burrito, and my Friday night instead of brawling with the remote.

But I also got a chance to see just much TV I’ve been watching.

It seems I spend a lot of my time with my feet up on the coffee table looking at the screen. I tell myself I’m just unwinding before getting to work, but I don’t feel terribly productive.

I also have this habit of retaining and replaying old, unpleasant memories, which does nothing but make me miserable. This is the year of Hey 19 and I want to delete these unhealthy thought patterns and make a conscious effort to be positive.

My new remote is due to arrive by midweek. When it finally does get it here, I’m going to use it to delete those old programs and then I’m going to hit that Off button and go out and make some new memories.