Golden Boy

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“Everybody thinks you reach a certain age and you're a grownup, but it's not true. Nobody grows up until the day they croak.”—Keith Richard The timing was spooky.

I’m planning to retire in about nine months, which is both scary and wonderful.

Yeah, I’m very much looking forward to finally stopping work, but I still can’tbelieve I’ve actually reached retirement age.

I finally stopped by my local senior center at the urging of my landlady last week, who told me the place has a gym. I wanted to check out the equipment in hopes of using it as a backup on rainy, cold, or busy days when I can’t make the 15‑block walk to my health club.

Plus, I figured I’d check out their classes — Tai Chi, stretching — and maybeeven the cafeteria.

Okay, first, I want to say it’s a great place that does wonderful work. I met some very nice, helpful people, including one who gave me a tour and explained everything the center has to offer.

The problem is me. I’m still having trouble believing that I can rightfully join the center.

It seems like it was just last week I was taking my father to a nearby senior citizen center for half‑day socializing. I cried so hard that day seeing my dad with all those old people.

Now it was my turn.

Stroll Around the Grounds…

I’m already getting senior transportation fare, and I shop on Wednesdays at a local supermarket to get the geezer’s discount. But this felt different. It felt like I was crossing a line.

And then the other day I came across a Prudential commercial featuring an older gentleman in a convertible with a group of freakishly happy old timers who smile broadly while hoisting their hands in the air.

“So, you guys do this every day?” our hero, Rick, asks.

“Welcome to your golden years,” a creepy mellow voice says.

“This is not my retirement.”

“No, Rick,” the uber‑voice says. “This is everyone’s retirement.”

Rick puts his head back and lets out a horror‑movie slow‑motion scream while the voice of reason gives the company’s schtick.

That’s an exaggerated version of reality, of course, but it did kind of hit me a little harder than I would’ve liked.

I’m a big fan of qigong, the Chinese energy exercise, and one of my favorite YouTube practitioners recently posted a senior‑friendly video.

I haven’t looked at it, even though I’m a big fan of this instructor’s work, and I have no immediate plans to do so. Not now, dude; not yet.

And that’s how I feel about the senior center. I fully intend to take advantage of all the wonderful things it has to offer, particularly the Medicare advice sessions.

But not now; not yet.

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