Saturday, April 22, 2017

Germs of Fear

I like to do this visualization exercise where I imagine a beam of pure light coming down straight from Heaven and going right into the top of my head.

The beautiful light clears away all the negative thoughts and emotions in my head, breaks the mental chains that are holding me back and allows me to look at the world with a fresh pair of eyes.

The light moves down to my nose, mouth and throat, where it sweeps away all the germs that may be lurking there, a perfect image for a hypochondriac like yours truly.

From there the light surges through my entire body, clearing away and fixing up all my various ailments both real and imagined. This routine may sound corny to some people, but I love it.

However, the other day I got silently tongue-tied when I thought to myself “the light clears away the fear germs.”

Fear germs? There’s no such thing, I told myself.

But now I’m starting to wonder about that. Fear can grip us like a terrible disease if we let it take over our minds. Pretty soon we’re talking ourselves out of all sorts of new possibilities, while talking ourselves into a lifetime of regret and busted dreams.

I’ve got a serious case of the heebie-jeebies right now as I prepare to take a business trip to Philadelphia in the morning.

Bulb in The Woods

I’m posting tonight because I’ve got to catch a train early tomorrow and I’m writing this on my company laptop because my Apple desktop croaked on me two days ago.

Can it really be seven years to since we went down to Prince Street on a snowy afternoon to pick up a shiny new computer and bring it home?

“Your computer is what we would call ‘vintage’,” the young woman from Apple told me Wednesday night. “There’s not much what we can do.”

Of course the timing sucked beyond belief, but then when is there a good time for your computer to kick the bucket?

I don’t have time to run down to the Apple store before I leave and I had to ask my saint of a sister to print out my train ticket so I get my keester down to the City of Brotherly Love. And I’m not anxious to shell out thousands of dollars for a new machine.


On top of that I fouled up the hotel reservation and had to scramble to get a place that’s more expensive and further away from the conference.

That is what I would call “bullshit.”

I’ve got the fear germs crawling all over me, digging into my soul and clinging to my mind--even though I’ve been to these conferences many times before.

A little bit of nerves is one thing, but I’m feeling so antsy right now I could ruin a dozen picnics.

All right, I think we need to throw a little light on the situation. And by a little light, I mean a lot, a gleaming, glorious shaft of sacred light that streaks down from Paradise and penetrates this thick skull of mine.

This spectacular beam is going to burn up those little fear germs like the hideous vermin they are. No moping about the past, no trembling at the future. I’m going to do my job.

All right, then. Let’s light it up.

6 comments:

Ron said...

Love the ending sentence of this post, Rob!

"his routine may sound corny to some people, but I love it."

No, it doesn't sound at all corny to me because I pretty much use the exact same "light" visualization in my meditations as well, and I love it too!

I also love the term "fear germs" because it's the perfect term for fearful thoughts, they are GERMS.

I had TWO computers die on me last year at the same time; therefore I know how you feel. You're right, it's never seems like the right time.

Have a great train trip into Philly tomorrow. Hopefully we'll have time to meet up while you're here. If not, we can meet up next week when I'm in NYC!

Safe travels, buddy!

A Cuban In London said...

What you describe as the light beam is what I call "body scan". It's not my phrase, it's from one of my meditation exercises. This body scan helps me cast out the negative influences and leave the positive ones, or at least the ones with which I can still carry on throughout my day. Interesting post. Thanks.

Greetings from London.

Rob K said...

Yes, the body scan, of course! That's a fabulous meditation. Thanks for stopping by, brother, and take care!

Rob K said...

@Ron, wow, two computers died on you! That's awful! We're just dependent on these things that when they break down, we're pretty screwed. More meditation is the answer!

Thanks for stopping by, buddy, and have a great week!

See you soon--in one place or the other!!

Bijoux said...

Seven years just doesn't seem long enough, but I guess that's modern technology. There's never a good time for a computer to die, but right before a trip is not good. Safe travels and I hope to hear about my friends' get together!

Rob K said...

Hey, Bijoux, I agree! Seven years isn't nearly enough, but we don't have much choice I'm afraid.

All kinds of things have gone wrong before and during this trip and at this point I'm just laughing at all the screw-ups and missteps.

I'll try to hook up with Ron while I'm in Philly and if not, I'll see him in New York!

And I want to meet you too!!

Take care!