The Luna Park Gazette

Can I just say something here without people getting all twisted and crazy? All right, here goes: I’m sorry to see John Rowland going to jail. Now, take it easy. Before you leap onto that soapbox or pound that table, I already know what you’re going to say. As Governor of Connecticut, John Rowland violated the public trust. He took gifts and services from businessmen who turned around and won hundreds of millions of dollars in contracts and tax breaks. His actions were outrageous, unconscionable, and unforgivable—not to mention incredibly stupid. And I think he deserves every day of jail time he gets—and probably a hell of a lot more. Yeah, I got all that and I’m a Democrat to boot. And yet I still feel bad for the guy. I’m one of God knows how many people who thought they knew John Rowland. Back in the early Rowland days, I was a reporter at the Waterbury Republican-American, Rowland’s hometown newspaper and in 1996 I got to accompany Rowland on his trade mission to Mexico. This wa...

I saw myself at the movies the other night. I was just going into the BAM Theater in downtown Brooklyn when I turned around and there I was. It didn’t look like me at all. I had glasses and a beard, and I was carrying a bag of popcorn. I was also taller and younger with a full head of hair. But it was me all right. I didn’t need the special effects skills of Industrial Light & Magic to be one person in two bodies that night. All I had to do was take a long look. This guy I was looking at was another person, but we were so alike we could have been clones. We were both alone on a Friday night and we were going to the movies. I don’t know this guy’s story at all, but in a way, I think I do. Movies are my favorite form of entertainment. I love seeing them, talking about them, and I’ve tried writing them, and since I’m going to the theater by myself on a Friday night, you can tell how successful I’ve been in that particular area. Tonight’s feature was a special Italian film selection ca...

Are you a creative, enthusiastic, team player who has tons of initiative? Can you hit the ground running, carry an intense workload, handle heavy call volume, speak seven languages and still maintain your sense of humor? Well, good for you. I’ve been out of work since July and after 9 months of reading classified ad copy I think I’m a little punchy. I’ve answered ad after ad, in newspapers, trade magazines, online and on the backs of buses. The result of all this effort is a handful of interviews, no job, and a non-stop headache from reading all these ridiculous ads. It’s another language, the want ads, written for another world. A world where people love their jobs, are rewarded for working hard, earn the respect of their employers and co-workers and lead happy, productive lives. In other words, Fantasy Land. Who writes this stuff? Who actually believes that anyone is this talented, dedicated or interested in a job? Hey, I’m out of work, I need a paycheck, let’s stop screwing arou...